Dear Lord, thank you for letting me be here to see another day again.
I'm grateful to be alive, God bless the souls that came and went.
I'm so lucky, to have a good family that loves me.
Please let my girl know how much I love her.
Sorry that we're both so unhealthy.
I feel so guilty,
every time I pray I feel like I ask you to help me.
I don't pray with the hope to get wealthy,
I just want success. I know it sounds selfish.
I've always been a screw up,
I finally got the chance to fix it.
I signed a record deal after all these years,
I wish I was more optimistic.
I'm really just scared.
What if they don't like what they hear?
What if I don't make a career outta music?
What am I supposed to do then?
I'm always getting judged,
I hate to see my face in the mirror.
I done wrote about everything so many times I don't have inspiration to spare.
I'm barely even here, I been down on the road and I feel like I've been gone all year.
Even when I'm home there's so much pressure to be Rittz,
it's hard to feel like I'm all there.
So many wish,
they could rap for a living so complaining about it's unfair.
Some days I feel like I've been living in a dream other times feeling like a nightmare.
And I need some ideas 'cuz I got a bunch of songs to write.
And I'm feeling like my future all depends on this.
Gotta rid myself of mental blocks and censorships.
Gotta get some confidence back in my penmanship.
I don't want to disappoint the fans who're listening.
'Cuz they expecting something incredible in the end.
Without them I'm nothing as I begin to get my stride back.
I remember when I was a kid and my dad
he would teach me how to play the guitar
me and my brother would pretend that we was in the band.
Musicians in my family would dream to be stars
only to condensate* to something that you didn't attend.
that music, must have been planned
I'm the chosen one, so I'ma quit trippin' and get behind this mic and rhyme.
The life and times of Jonny Valiant